Are you done judging that book?

I have had such a wonderful time lately connecting with old friends...seems to be happening all at once. Met an old friend who is adopting a baby and then have met many with kids, some with 4. But I realized that as much as they dont know about my journey, I dont know about theirs. I dont know how they came to have those 4 kids. They didnt shake my hand or give me a hug and say...Hi, nice to see you, I have 4 kids, all from IVF!" So I dont judge and try to remember that noone knows whats going on behind closed doors. Ok, so there is a good possibility when someone asks me "arent you having any more" that they probably havent traveled down this same lonely road...as they would know the code of conduct. Or atleast I hope so.
There was an article this week in the Washington Post about how Facebook is having a hard affect on people going through infertility, and I think it definitely is hard. But I have a friend who has only gloated about her kids, and yet probably most of the people who follow her on FB have no idea how she came to be a mother of two. So again, I dont judge those people.

I am trying to have an open mind about not only others, but also myself. Its harder to be open about yourself than it is about others. We have expectations of what we should do, where and how we fit in. We live in a society that tells us we need to know these things. We cant just float around willy nilly not knowing where we are going to end up. Well, i have had enough, I want to float around like a feather in the wind. Not knowing might be nice. I mean do I really know anythign? No! Do any of us? No! We just hope that it turns out the way we expect it to. So for now, I am taking a step back. I am going to try to work on being grateful on what I have and not beat myself up for what I dont have. I am going to try and be as open minded about myself as I am about others. We dont know, truly dont know... so dont even try to judge the book by the cover. You cant really judge it until you have read it and lived it cover to cover.

“I can speak of my own criterion for judging whether or not a book is good or bad. I ask of it a single question, From how deep and true an impulse did it spring? Was it written merely to shock? Only to make money? Or was it written to create something.”  Lawrence Clark Powell